ISFJs are characterized above all by their desire to serve others, their
"need to be needed." In extreme cases, this need is so strong that
standard give-and-take relationships are deeply unsatisfying to them;
however, most ISFJs find more than enough with which to occupy
themselves within the framework of a normal life. (Since ISFJs, like
all SJs, are very much bound by the prevailing social conventions, their
form of "service" is likely to exclude any elements of moral or
political controversy; they specialize in the local, the personal, and
the practical.)
ISFJs are often unappreciated, at work, home, and play. Ironically,
because they prove over and over that they can be relied on for their
loyalty and unstinting, high-quality work, those around them often take
them for granted--even take advantage of them. Admittedly, the problem
is sometimes aggravated by the ISFJs themselves; for instance, they are
notoriously bad at delegating ("If you want it done right, do it
yourself"). And although they're hurt by being treated like doormats,
they are often unwilling to toot their own horns about their
accomplishments because they feel that although they deserve more credit
than they're getting, it's somehow wrong to want any sort of
reward for doing work (which is supposed to be a virtue in itself).
(And as low-profile Is, their actions don't call attention to themselves
as with charismatic Es.) Because of all of this, ISFJs are often
overworked, and as a result may suffer from psychosomatic illnesses.
In the workplace, ISFJs are methodical and accurate workers, often with
very good memories and unexpected analytic abilities; they are also
good with people in small-group or one-on-one situations because of
their patient and genuinely sympathetic approach to dealing with others.
ISFJs make pleasant and reliable co-workers and exemplary employees,
but tend to be harried and uncomfortable in supervisory roles. They are
capable of forming strong loyalties, but these are personal rather than institutional
loyalties; if someone they've bonded with in this way leaves the
company, the ISFJ will leave with them, if given the option.
Traditional careers for an ISFJ include: teaching, social work, most
religious work, nursing, medicine (general practice only), clerical and
and secretarial work of any kind, and some kinds of administrative
careers.
While their work ethic is high on the ISFJ priority list, their families
are the centers of their lives. ISFJs are extremely warm and
demonstrative within the family circle--and often possessive of their
loved ones, as well. When these include Es who want to socialize with
the rest of the world, or self-contained ITs, the ISFJ must learn to
adjust to these behaviors and not interpret them as rejection. Being
SJs, they place a strong emphasis on conventional behavior (although,
unlike STJs, they are usually as concerned with being "nice" as with
strict propriety); if any of their nearest and dearest depart from the
straight-and-narrow, it causes the ISFJ major embarrassment: the closer
the relationship and the more public the act, the more intense the
embarrassment (a fact which many of their teenage children take gleeful
advantage of). Over time, however, ISFJs usually mellow, and learn to
regard the culprits as harmless eccentrics :-). Needless to say, ISFJs
take infinite trouble over meals, gifts, celebrations, etc., for their
loved ones--although strong Js may tend to focus more on what the
recipient should want rather than what they do want.
Like most Is, ISFJs have a few, close friends. They are extremely loyal
to these, and are ready to provide emotional and practical support at a
moment's notice. (However, like most Fs they hate confrontation; if
you get into a fight, don't expect them to jump in after you. You can
count on them, however, run and get the nearest authority figure.)
Unlike with EPs, the older the friendship is, the more an ISFJ will
value it. One ISFJ trait that is easily misunderstood by those who haven't
known them long is that they are often
unable to either hide or articulate any distress they may be feeling.
For instance, an ISFJ child may be reproved for "sulking," the actual
cause of which is a combination of physical illness plus misguided "good
manners." An adult ISFJ may drive a (later ashamed) friend or SO into a
fit of temper over the ISFJ's unexplained moodiness, only afterwards to
explain about a death in the family they "didn't want to burden anyone
with." Those close to ISFJs should learn to watch for the warning signs
in these situations and take the initiative themselves to uncover the
problem.
Take test here: Personality Test
Quite accurate for me, so scaryyyyyy.
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